jellybean crisis!
by stevetheripper
Summary: CHAPTER 3 UP short story shorter, link nicks jellybeans ness young link beat crap out of go shopping to get more gasp
1. Default Chapter

I don't own anything, except those dead crickets over there. Oh yeah.  
  
---------------------------------  
  
At the smashers mansion.  
  
Young link: this here jellybean ain't big enough for the both of us!  
  
Ness: I had it first!  
  
Y.link: no I did!  
  
Ness and Young are glaring at each other, when Link comes in  
  
Link: Jellybeans! * shovels the whole bowl into his mouth * wassup people?  
  
Ness and Young link jump on Link and beat the crap out of him  
  
Link: ay carumba!  
  
Young link: slice his stomach open and get my beans back!  
  
Ness: oh, good idea! With my yo-yo or baseball bat?  
  
Young link: are you completely stupid? Get a knife! And besides, they're my jellybeans!  
  
Ness: mine!  
  
Y.link: mine!  
  
Ness: mine!  
  
Y.link: mine!  
  
Link: SHUT UP!!!!  
  
Silence.  
  
Link: if you want jellybeans . . .  
  
Young link and ness: mmmyeeeeeeeeess?  
  
Link: . . .so badly, you're gonna have to go to the suprmarket, I've got to go get some stuff anyway.  
  
Luigi: Jellybeans?  
  
Link: oh dear god.  
  
Luigi: canicomecanicomecanicomecanicomecanicomecanicome?  
  
Link: o.k. , But you're payi-  
  
Luigi: yipeeyipeeyipeeyipeeyipeeyipee! * Runs off like a hyperactive 10 year old *  
  
Link: weird.  
  
Ness: what were you trying to tell him?  
  
Link: nothing, but he better bring his wallet.  
  
Stevetheripper: Will ness and Y.link ever get their jellybeans?  
  
Y.link&Ness: YYYYYEEEEEEESSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!  
  
Stevetheripper: apparently so. Will Link ever get rid of his migrane?  
  
Link: it doesn't feel like it.  
  
Stevetheripper: will Luigi stop acting hyper?  
  
Luigi: HYPERHYPERHYPERHYPERHYPERHYPERHPERHHYPPEERRR!  
  
Stevetheripper: Do fishes drink?  
  
Link: what?  
  
Stevethripper: haven't you ever wondered though?  
  
Link: ugh. . . 


	2. 50 kinds of snappy turtles?

Disclaimer: dead crickets.  
  
At the supermarket. . . ---------------------------------  
  
Young link: it's huge! It'd take you three days to get past the line!  
  
Link: that's the "adult magazine" section.  
  
Young link: oh. . .  
  
Young Link trips over  
  
Young link: agh! **** you **** why did they put that ******* floor there when someone could ******* trip over it.  
  
Ness and Link: . . . 0.0 0.0  
  
Young link: ****  
  
Ness: uh . . .here's some stuff for that. hands Young link some lemon juice.  
  
Luigi: WHERE'S DA BEANS!?!?  
  
Link: about 3 miles that way *points in a random direction*  
  
Luigi: WAHOOOOOOOOOOooooooooo. . .*runs off*  
  
Link: ha! The jokes on him, the beans are 3 miles THAT way!  
  
Young link and Ness: -.-'  
  
Link: what?  
  
The guys see marth walking past  
  
Marth: hey guys, does this place sell snappy turtles?  
  
Young link: snappy turtles?  
  
Link: 50 kinds, why?  
  
Marth: no reason. . .  
  
Marth runs off  
  
Ness: weird  
  
Young link: anyway, does this place sell real swords?  
  
Link: yeah.  
  
Young link: wahoo! I can finally get rid of this pathetic excuse for a knife!  
  
Stevetheripper: be afraid. . . be very afraid. . .  
  
Young link: who asked you?  
  
a giant fish falls on Young link  
  
Stevetheripper: anybody else got any stupid questions?  
  
Ness: actually, I was wondering if-  
  
Stevetheripper: yes?  
  
Ness: forget it. . .  
  
Stevetheripper: will they ever get around to actually BUYING the j.beans?  
  
Ness: we haven't bought them yet?  
  
Stevetheripper: will link start feeling the pressure?  
  
Link: * Gurgle *  
  
Stevetheripper: Is there a magnetic robot named john that lives in the middle of the earth?  
  
Link: What?  
  
Stevetheripper: haven't you ever wondered though? 


	3. jigglydarts!

Disclaimer: dead crickets  
  
Link: shut up  
  
Disclaimer: . . .no?  
  
Link: You dare defy the almighty Link?  
  
A lot of screaming and squishy gut-like noises are heard. Wonder what that could be.  
  
Stevetheripper: .lets not get into the details of that.On with the fic ------------------------------------------  
  
The male smashers are sleeping. For now. . .  
  
Roy: AGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!  
  
Mewtwo sighs  
  
Mewtwo: let me guess . .you've got several snappy turtles clamped too your foot?  
  
Roy: I hate it when you do that. But yes. GET 'EM OFF!!!!  
  
Marth tries to hide his laughing  
  
Roy: who did this?!  
  
Mewtwo glares at marth briefly  
  
Marth: um . . .sorry?  
  
Roy: nope  
  
Marth: . . .really sorry?  
  
Roy shakes his head  
  
Marth: um. I'm gonna get sliced to pieces?  
  
Roy grins, and nods  
  
Marth: I was afraid of that.  
  
Roy reaches for his sword  
  
Marth: erk  
  
With the other smashers.. -----------------------------------  
  
Young link: me like jellybeans!  
  
Link: uh huh  
  
Ness: me like jellybeans!  
  
Link: uh huh..  
  
Young link & Ness: we love jellybeans!  
  
Links right eye twitches  
  
With the guys. ------------------  
  
Roy: why were we sleeping anyway? It's 6:30!  
  
Mewtwo: Jigglypuff singing in the shower.  
  
Popo: so?  
  
Mewtwo: travels through the pipes.  
  
Ganondorf: ...who here reckons jiggly-squirt is a live balloon?  
  
All present raise their hand. Except mewtwo, who raises popo  
  
Mewtwo: I like me when I'm evil.  
  
Ganondorf: who here wants a game of darts?  
  
Everyone grins  
  
Roy: to the shower!  
  
At the showers..  
  
Jigglypuff is here singing.  
  
Mewtwo walks in with a pair of pink ear-protectors on  
  
Jigglypuff: jiiiggly- uh?  
  
Mewtwo glares at jigglypuff, who freezes, mewtwo's eyes then glow and A dart comes from no-where.  
  
Jigglypuff: ..AGHH!!!  
  
Mewtwo: come on in guys!  
  
Everybody mentioned before walks in, darts at the ready.  
  
Ganondorf: ahahha!! He's got pink ear-protectors!  
  
Mewtwo glares at ganondorf, who's eyes glaze over and then he walks up to a wall, and starts banging his head on it  
  
Mewtwo takes them off  
  
Popo: so.?-  
  
Mewtwo: took 'em from Zelda  
  
Popo: ah  
  
Mewtwo: throw them darts!  
  
Everyone cheers, except ganondorf, who is still banging his head on a wall  
  
Jigglypuff: ..  
  
Mewtwo: I'm sorry, did you say something?  
  
Mewtwo grins evilly  
  
Mewtwo is suddenly blasted into a wall, by ganondorf.  
  
Ganondorf: didn't see that one coming did ya?  
  
Jigglypuff is no longer disabled, and starts to sing.  
  
Mewtwo: aw crap  
  
In the supermarket.  
  
Link: nearly there.  
  
Luigi: yay!  
  
Link: agh! What the-  
  
Luigi, ness & Young link: WE LOVE JELLYBEANS!!!  
  
Link: ack!  
  
Young link: I wouldn't shout Luigi, you're old enough for him to hit without him being called a child abuser.  
  
Link: hanks for pointing that out.  
  
Luigi: * sucks thumb *  
  
Young link: no problem.  
  
Stevetheripper: that's all for now folks. WILL they buy ANYTHING?  
  
Young link: we were supposed to buy something here?  
  
Stevetheripper: istherea-  
  
Everyone: NO!  
  
Stevetheripper: haven't you eve-  
  
Everyone: NO!!  
  
Stevetheripper: fine . . . 


	4. Technical difficulties

Disclaimer: . . .  
  
Stevetheripper: * kicks the body under the curtain * * ahem * I own dead crickets. * Sits down and waits for applause * . . .  
  
Crickets: * CHIRP *  
  
Stevetheripper: you live!  
  
Link: enough of that. On with the fic -----------------------  
  
Young link ness Luigi and link are sitting on chairs drinking coffee  
  
Luigi: no seriously though, this career hurts my throat . . . I'm supposed to yell too much  
  
Ness: that's because the director hates you.  
  
Luigi: you think?  
  
Young link: Definitely, I mean, remember that time he told you your stunt- double was on holiday? Well-  
  
Cameraman: Breaks over! Get ready!  
  
Link: it is? Crap! Where'd I put my shield!  
  
Luigi: why do you need a shield for a supermarket anyway?  
  
Link: why do you need to carry bouncing glow-lights in your pocket?  
  
Luigi: touché.  
  
In the girls dorm --------------------  
  
Peach: spin it! Come on!  
  
Samus: why do we have to play spin the bottle anyway? It's boring!  
  
Nana: no it's not! Spin it!  
  
Samus shoots the bottle, sending glass everywhere  
  
Peach: my hair!  
  
Zelda: my eye!  
  
Peach: That doesn't matter1 look at my hair! It's all glassy! And I just had it done! Woe is me!  
  
With the rest of the crew . . . -----------------------  
  
Captain falcon is playing with his remote cars which with the help of fox he has attached turbo-boosters and lasers to, yoshi and Kirby are having an eating contest, popo is having a staring competition with mewtwo , and losing, DK is teaching his pet rock how to fetch and the rest are eating popcorn and watching tv.  
  
Falco: why don't we get a bigger tv?  
  
Mario: is that all-a you ever think about?  
  
Falco: no. for instance now I am thinking we need some more popcorn If tubby is gonna sit next to us  
  
Bowser: * with his mouth full * it'sh glandular *  
  
Falco: whatever  
  
Pikachu suddenly gets hit in the head by a laser  
  
Pikachu: Ow! * shocks captain falcon and his cars *  
  
Captain falcon: NO! blue falcon! Are you ok!?  
  
Fox: ugh..  
  
DK: fetch, boy! Uh, rollover!  
  
Now that they're ready . . . ---------------------  
  
Young link: your fly's undone, ness  
  
Ness: oh, sh-  
  
I SAID! Now that they are ready! -------------------  
  
Link: now that they are ready what?  
  
Stevetheripper: ugh. . . that's it for now  
  
Stevetheripper: do ants brusssssssssssssssssssssss* beep *  
  
We are experiencing some technical difficulties. Not really. Steve just can't be bothered to type the rest. Goodbye. Please review.  
  
Stevetheripper: it's quick, cheesy AND efficient. I'm glad I bought that recording. I'm gonna use it more often  
  
Link: no you're not  
  
Stevetheripper: aw . . . 


	5. Very much alive crickets

A magnetic robot named john: Steve owns his very much alive crickets.  
  
Stevetheripper: damn straight!  
  
On with da fic... --------------------  
  
in the garden... ---------------------  
  
???: no! Not the light! I'm melting! Melting! Ugh, what's all this green stuff on my new nike jacket?  
  
Samus: wake up!  
  
Kirby: yeah! Carpet-man!  
  
Ganondorf: WHAT? IT'S A CAPE! DON'T YOU EVER LEARN!!?? Oh, by the way thanks for waking me.  
  
Ganondorf walked inside.  
  
Popo: what are we doing out here?  
  
Samus: peach had to use the bathroom, and we found you guys sleeping in there, so I had to drag you all out here.  
  
Mewtwo: I knew that.  
  
Popo: why didn't you tell us then?  
  
Mewtwo Roy said it is annoying.  
  
Popo: Not when we need the information!  
  
Mewtwo: when you think about it you don't ACTUALLY need to know  
  
Popo: it would have been nice!  
  
Mewtwo: I've had enough.  
  
Mewtwo disables Popo, and teleports away.  
  
Popo: whoa... everything's so colour... look at all the pretty dizzys...  
  
Popo falls flat on his face.  
  
Samus stood there staring the whole time.  
  
Samus: you guys have more problems than I thought.  
  
Samus walks off.  
  
In da supermarket of DOOM! ---------------------------------  
  
Young link & Ness: Are we there yet?  
  
Link: no  
  
Young link & Ness: Are we there yet?  
  
Link: no  
  
Young link & Ness: Are we there yet?  
  
Link: no  
  
Young link & Ness: Are we there yet?  
  
Link: no  
  
Young link & Ness: Are we there yet?  
  
Link: no!  
  
Young link & Ness: Are we there yet?  
  
Link: NO!  
  
Young link & Ness: Are we there yet?  
  
Link: NO!!  
  
Young link & Ness: Are we there yet?  
  
Link: NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! SHUT UP! I'LL TELL YOU WHEN WE'RE THERE!!!!!!!!!  
  
Silence.  
  
Luigi: are we there yet?  
  
Link turns around verrrry slowly...  
  
The people back at the smashers mansion heard what Luigi said next  
  
"MAMA MIA!!!!!!"  
  
Stevedaextracoolthannormalripper: that's all for now.  
  
Stevedaextracoolthannormalripper: Do ants brussssssssssssssssssssssssssss* BEEP *  
  
We are exp-  
  
Link kicks the machine  
  
We are exp-  
  
Link kicks the machine  
  
We areeee eexpee-  
  
Link kicks the machine. HARD  
  
Weareexperiencistevelazystevelazystevelazyexperiencingstevelazystevelazylazy lazylazylazylazystevestevestevelazylazystevelazystevelazyexperiencingstevela zystevelazylazylazylazylazylazystevestevestevelazylazystevelazystevelazyexpe riencingstevelazystevelazylazylazylazylazylazystevestevestevelazylazystevela zystevelazyexperiencingstevelazystevelazylazylazylazylazylazystevestevesteve lazylazystevelazystevelazyexperiencingstevelazystevelazylazylazylazylazylazy stevestevestevelazy * BOOM *  
  
Steve: aw! paid good money for that!  
  
Link: too bad! NOW DO IT PROPERLY!  
  
Steve: hehehe... that sounded dirty  
  
Link: NOW!  
  
Steve: OK, OK... take a chill pill.  
  
Steve: do ants brush their teeth?  
  
Steve: do ants have teeth to brush?  
  
Link: what?  
  
Steve: * yawn * haven't you- ah screw it.  
  
Machine: experiencingstevelazy  
  
Steve: shut up! * kicks machine and gets blasted *  
  
Steve: does my insurance cover for insane hyleans? 


End file.
